Meet Turner

Meet Turner: He brings joy to everyone he meets. He loves to laugh, be hugged and do high fives. He likes school, and he likes to party. He has a ton of friends.

He is super awesome. Turner loves country music. Luke Bryan is his all time favorite. He is so happy almost all the time. He is just full of light and love. Full of God. He is my greatest teacher. Teaches me how to be present and how to be happy with right now. He is super handsome and cute. He has a contagious smile and laugh. He loves being outside: camping, horse therapy, rafting, four wheeling, swimming (loves the hot water). Music camp and skis with Challenge Aspen. We think his purpose is to bring joy to everyone he meets, to teach people about disabilities and raising awareness. He has a ton of really good friends at school. They actually swarm him if he has been gone, yelling, “Turner, Turner, Turner!” He’s just a pretty happy guy most all the time.

Turner understands everything. Talk to him like you would any 10 year old boy. He is not fragile. He is very strong. He loves to play. He loves to laugh. He likes to be hugged and do high fives. He loves school. All the chaos, the noise, the loudness. He is very social. He likes a party.

It’s completely affected my life, in many good ways. I’ve learned to look for the miracles. Look and see the good in people and the world. It made my faith and relationship with God a lot stronger. To be present. I strive to be more like Turner. To be content with where you’re at and what you’re doing. I’m not always so good at it. Our family is stronger. My husband and I have been through a lot together and we still love each other so much and are still a very strong, committed family.

It hasn’t been easy, that’s for sure. It’s not easy expecting your life to be different when you’re pregnant and excited about your little baby and not knowing what’s to come, Definitely has been hard. Turner has had many surgeries. So it’s not easy to watch your child go under anesthesia and wait and pray for the best. He’s had two major hip surgeries. Those are very difficult to go through. We go to Children’s about every 3 months to follow up with several doctors. In May, he had 10 appointments. So it’s our life. I call and schedule appointments and go to them, it’s a big part of our life. He’s worth all of it.

My hope for Turner is that he is happy. I’d love it if one day he walks and talks and if not that’s okay too.  It would be really fun to communicate more with him. We do really well communicating without him speaking much but it would be really cool to have it come out of his mouth exactly what he’s thinking. I want to give him really fun experiences. Enjoy his life and have fun and have great friends.

He’s met Luke Bryan really briefly. I would love for him to be able to go hunting or fishing with him. Turner is happy almost all the time. When he’s had surgery or if he’s having an off day, which we all have, Luke Bryan saves the day all the time. I put that music on and it just instantly helps. I think it would be fun for him to have some more time with him. Any new song that comes out, he recognizes his voice instantly.

I think an inclusive world really comes down to love. It comes down to loving everyone, differences and all. Acceptance and awareness. We don’t want pity or sympathy. Empathy is good. A little understanding goes a long way. I think if people learn that different is beautiful and if people really loved everyone, it changes the world. I think it’s so important to start with kids. I think the kids at school have learned so much from Turner. They’re amazing. They don’t see him different. I think if everyone could have that experience or learn that way, it would be a different world. And we’ve come so far but there is still a ways to go.

I would love if there was an inclusive, accessible playground in our valley. The closest on is in Grand Junction. We need one that’s local, that’s where everyone’s friends are to play with. I think everyone should have the right to play, not just kids but adults as well. I think it’s so much about teaching that differences are cool and not that they are weird or strange. I think inclusive play really encourages acceptance and friendship. Teaching at an early age. It’s a universal design. You don’t look at it as that’s the area, it’s just all incorporated. There are more and more being built in Denver. There’s not a ton that we can easily go out and do for play in our town. There’s nothing he can do at any of our playgrounds. They have a swing but he needs to be transferred. An important thing about play is that in can be just kids. At the playground now, he needs an adult. There is something to be said to kids just playing together. 

Just because Turner doesn’t talk doesn’t mean he doesn’t hear and understand everything. We talk to him all the time, we ask a lot of questions. He as an augmentative alternative communication device that he uses more at school but he pushes buttons and asks for root beer or asks for his friends. Root beer is his favorite. He can say if he doesn’t like something or if he wants something. He’s getting a lot better at that.

Talk to him like a typical child. Just because he doesn’t answer you doesn’t mean he’s not hearing everything. Just because he doesn’t ask for it in words, he answers in different ways. You just have to listen a little differently. That’s my husband’s quote. You have to be a little patient. We call it “Turner Time.” Sometimes you’re not going to get the answer right away. If you’re just a little patient you’ll see his communication.

Rather than staring, come over and say hi. Ask us questions. We would rather the connection than the stares. Turner has the same wants and desires as any 10 year old. He wants to have friends, play, eat Cheetos, laugh and be silly.

Join the conversation.  We want to hear YOUR voice.

Have you found yourself afraid to greet someone? After reading Turner’s story, how will that be different for you?

Have you had the opportunity to live in an inclusive community?  Tell us about it.

Have you interacted with someone who is non-verbal?  What worked?

Resources:

How to recognize and inclusive community:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ed8jApjyaxs

How to communicate with someone who is non-verbal:  https://www.friendshipcircle.org/blog/2013/04/16/23-ways-to-communicate-with-a-non-verbal-child/

Build Your Non-Verbal Skills:  https://www.skillsyouneed.com/ips/nonverbal-communication.html

KIF1A.org

Q&A How do I speak with someone who is nonverbal?

AccessiblePlayground.net